Cast Updates

I have decided that it might be worth updating people on the status of various cast members tonight. So, running through in alphabetical order and with the addition of a new potential member, here we go.

• Affair - Is still around, though I get less chance to talk to her these days since her boyfriend has recently become unemployed and is spending more time at home. However she is still trying to arrange a visit to me, or vice-versa, where we will be undisturbed by her boyfriend and both of us will have a chance to once again indulge in the rampant and rather messy sex which we had before certain circumstances persuaded us that staying together would be to the detriment of both our lives, and that we were better off as simply friends with the potential for benefits.
• BedBuddy - Has now found herself a boyfriend and, while we are still friends, is not currently a member of the cast. She did however send me some interesting pictures of herself and her new boyfriend. She will be being removed from my little cast list shortly.
  
• Essex - Is very much still around in a friendly, no-strings attached to either party manner. I am hoping to find an opportune time to visit her again soon.
• Miss Complicated - Is purely a friend now, things just got far too stressful for either of us to maintain even pretense at something more. Holding back and simply being friendly while discussing the overthrow of the government seems much easier for both of us.
• Mystery - Is still very much around, and has even commented on here recently. She will be remaining anonymous for the time being though. Wish that she lived a lot closer.
• Slave - Post-visit a decision has been reached whereby we will be remaining friendly, but accept that we are not suited for that sort of relationship. Frankly she is far too much hard work as are many of her friends. I am not willing to start providing that much support.
• Stalker - Has calmed down and backed away recently, but still regularly tries to contact me.
• Student - Is still around as a friend, and as an occasional bedwarmer. There is no real passion between us, at least not of the romantic time, but there are times when a bedwarmer or a simple, uncomplicated, unemotional fuck makes things much clearer.
• Sweetie - Again, very much still around and hopefully I will be seeing her before Christmas. Things are getting a little complicated here however, as she is starting to let me know that she is jealous. Not quite sure what to do since she also does not want to break things off.
• Tart - Completely gone, simply vanished off the face of the earth as far as I can tell. Mutual friends and acquaintances have no idea what has happened to her so it seems she may have simply gone.

Now as to the new one, tonight I was meant to be meeting with some friends who I have not seen for a while. Those friends managed to lose mobile phones or just fail to answer them, but while waiting in the pub I was approached by a young lass with a pretty face and a Russian accent. The rest of her body was also not unnattractive, and we began a conversation about fantasy writing and the supernatural before drifting into other topics. After a tour of several bars and a coffee shop she was returned home, with any innocence that she may have had intact except for some moderate tickling, playing around and petting. Phone numbers exchanged, and the conversation has continued through the wonders of text messaging. So, a new member of the cast, I would like you all to meet Russian.

Hijacking a Vaio

Student seems to have amazing taste in laptops, it must be said. She is also eminently simple. Other than a mild, friendly affection there are no real feelings between us. We get along, we can have sex. Simple and easy. No commitment to worry about, no emotional complications, if either she or I find someone else then we are still friends, and if we do not then still, we are friends.

Anyway I am sure a lot of you wanted the gory details. I am afraid there is not any gore involved. In fact it could be said that Student, for all of her talk, is almost distressingly vanilla. I get the impression that she does not want to be, but she most definitely is. After we went out for a meal we went back to her dorm room, put on a film, and ended up having sex which was pleasant, almost in the same way that I used to enjoy masturbation until it got boring. We then lay there talking about the hobbies we share, the fact that there was no 'click' between us, then slept until morning.

In the morning there was a repeat performance, again very casual and mundane, before a trip into town where I picked up supplies for the rest of the weekend. Cigarettes and brandy. Lovely.

I think I may steal this laptop.

Escaping Reality

I do not have much time to post this before having to leave for work so I will have to forego my usual linguistic athletics and post in common English.

This weekend I am going away to escape for a time from reality. After work today I will be driving to meet, and visit, Student overnight followed by another smaller drive tomorrow afternoon to go to a winter LRP event. Hopefully I will not freeze to death too easily, as the accomodation for the event is inside and I will be taking full furs to wrap up in during the day and the battles. Not to mention that I will be taking magical warming potion, commonly referred to as ginger wine or mead.

Of course, I will not be wearing any metal armour, for obvious reasons. Metal armour in this sort of weather cools quickly and chills the wearer, no matter how much they move around. Chainmail is the worst as it presses close to your skin.

My weapons will be travelling up in the car with me. These are not the metal kind, but foam and latex replicas designed to look realistic, but with no risk of accidentally hacking off someone's limb. I have no idea what the plot for this event is, or really even the system, but hopefully that will be explained when I get there.

Hopefully I will get another chance to post, maybe even nab Student's computer tomorrow if I can, or to put up some messages from gabcast to reassure you all that I am still alive and well. I can check e-mail of course, though will probably only be able to do so at night when we have stopped having to run around hitting each other.

Either way, I am escaping reality for a while. I will see all of you kiddliwinks when I get back.

Red Letter Club

Suprisingly, more people took me up on this in the first day than I was expecting. The number is at four at the moment, which is four more than I was expecting, and anyone else interested in having a physical, actual letter is welcome to e-mail me. I am enjoying this writing thing.

In other news I am getting more than a little fed up with work. Today my most exciting task involved two hours of dragging items around on a screen, and clicking the occasional button. My job search is rapidly becoming more enthusiastic. If I do not find something soon I may have to start looking into thieving.

The escort idea, as well as the own business idea, have also been running through my mind a lot. I have decided that if I do not have something full time by the end of January I am applying to join an agency for a month, and we will see how it goes from there.

Should be visiting Student on Thursday after work, and then I have a weekend of rest and relaxation. This will also include no internet, but I will try to make a couple of posts through the magic of gabcast.

Pet Names and Nicknames

I am sure that everyone has been called by one of these at some point in their life. Whether as a term of endearment such as sweetie, pet, gorgeous, or something similar which now breeches our lovely new view of political correctness, or as something less pleasant or less innocent. I tend to use these for people a lot. Even male friends will occasionally get called 'Sugarpie' or 'Snugglelumps', usually when I am trying to scrounge a drink from them. The most common two which I use though are 'Girly' and 'Boy'.

Of course this does irritate some people, particularly when I start using them on people obviously older than me, but in general I get away with it. Some limited number of the people I know actually have nicknames of their own, which I will usually use.

The kicker is that I personally believe a nickname you have acquired down the years actually says something about you, whether that is pleasant or unpleasant. You have actually earned a true nickname, and it will then stay with you faithfully. Only the closest of my family use my real name when speaking to or of me, anyone else calls me 'Rabbit' or 'Bunny', or variations thereof. That name has been with me for years now, since I was at University, and while it may be overly-feminized or just plain silly, it is my nickname and I am rather attached to it.

The theorised reasons for my nickname are many, and varied, but you can now hear the true story. At University I shared a house with various people of the female persuasion. Comments were made likening me in various ways to members of the lapine species. Eventually the comments stopped being made, and simply the name remained. Of course, one evening while the group of us were watching a film the conversation ended up turning to sex toys. During this conversation the Ann Summers Rampant Rabbit was mentioned, and things moved from there.

So what are your nicknames, and how did you get them? If you do not have one what would you like it to be and why?

Only a few weeks now until my trip into the land of debauchery and sin, which I am rather looking forward to. Slave has apparently been cleaning for the last few days, or at least trying to clean. Hopefully she will be meeting me at the airport, and with a little luck I can restrain myself until the risk of being hauled in by security guards is gone.

Also looking forward to meeting up with, or rather staying with, Student in a couple of weeks. Just for a night before I go camping, but with any luck she will be joining me on the weekend as well.

Apparently I Am Not Irresistable

I know, I know, this is a hard idea to come to terms with, but it appears to be true.

Actually the title of this entry is a bit of a lie. Not that I am not irresistable, that but is true, but it is a bit off-topic for the rest of the post. For some reason all I could think to write about tonight was confidence, and lack of it or over-abundance of it. See the thing is I actually have both. Simultaneously I can have complete and utter self-confidence, almost offensively so, and act accordingly, and I can be utterly insecure and uncertain about everything.

I suppose the title is somewhat related. It does not shake my faith in myself if someone does not find me attractive, or even likeable. In fact it does not alter my view of myself at all, I know that some people find me attractive and that is enough. Except that it is not, because there is a flip side to the coin. The fact that people find me attractive, and I know that they do, does nothing to boost my confidence because I never seem to be able to persuade myself that it means anything.

I am sure I am not the only one who feels this, and do not believe I am for a second. I am just curious whether anyone thinks this is due to some unshakeable self-doubt inside me, instilled during years of torment in childhood, or whether it is the opposite and I have some sort of permanent internal self-belief, simply from surviving said torment.

And in other news, off to see yet another new member of the cast in a couple of weeks. For now I think Student will do for her, as it is a nicely descriptive name. She is kind of cute, can match me for innuendo quite comfortably, and has no interest in any form of relationship or commitment. At least in theory.

Sweetie is prodding for some sort of commitment, but so far she does not seem to want to go as far as pushing me into it. I appreciate that she is not trying to push me, but it does make me feel a little guilty. I know I am not using her and I have told her that there are others but I almost feel that it would be better for her to find someone else and realise that there are people out there who will have a genuine relationship with her.