30 October 2007

Love, Hate and My Inability to Have Casual Sex

Casual sex is supposed to be a fun and entertaining thing for all involved, and in a way I regret that I find it impossible to have it. The idea of essentially using another person as a masturbatory aid, having no feelings whatsoever for them, no emotional connection, no little spark, nothing is a huge turn-off for me. In fact it makes me feel sick.

Angel's to blame for this post in a way, since she made a costume suggestion and I always like to fully research a costume. I found the character, at least the more modern one, stunningly appealing. I felt I had a lot in common with him. I am not arrogant enough to consider myself the greatest lover in the world, probably simply somewhere in the top ten, but the modern, romanticised version definitely has habits I can sympathise with.

To clarify for anyone who may not know, Don Juan deMarco is a semi-mythological figure and has been changed over the years. He started out as a callous heartbreaker, uncaring about the women he seduced, simply trying to prove his worth through the sheer quantity of his lovers. In more modern versions of the tale though he has changed somewhat, to become something of a fool who simply falls in love with great ease. It is arguable whether his conquests are people he has seduced, or simply people he is unable to refuse. There was what is supposed to be a good film starring Johnny Depp released, but I have yet to see the film.

This is the bit where I feel sympathy for him. I know that I fall for people very easily, not necessarily love, but something. I find it impossible not to form some sort of emotional attachment to most people, whether that attachment is affectionate or repulsion, there is almost always something. One of the things that most offends me is being referred to as a 'player'. I am not, in any way, a player. At least not as I see it. A player is the original form of Don Juan, a heartbreaker who only cares for their own pleasure and is simply trying to rack up their score. On the other hand I am quite happy being referred to as a slut. It seems fair, I find it very difficult to say no to people, particularly people I like. In fact I have slept with people who I could be considered to hate before, but that is a long and complicated story for another time.

And now some other news. I have apparently achieved two things in almost the same day. Firstly I have inspired Twin Pistols to start her own creative writing blog to showcase their work, and I have also won an award from Nosjunkie. I was grinning for about an hour after finding out, since this is a first for me. I particularly appreciated the comment that reading my blog had apparently improved her sex life, though I must admit I am curious as to how. I will have to throw in a few more tips on sex in the future I suppose, considering the google searches that bring people here and this particular comment.

5 comments:

AngelConradie said...

heh heh... glad you like the idea, and i do like the modernised "romantic" version of don juan.
congratulations on your award- can't wait for your posts on sex tips...
and i can't wait to see who's started blogging their fiction!

Simply Curious said...

Congrats on the award!

Anonymous said...

You are the man!

Congratulations on your award and for improving someones sex life.

Twin Pistols said...

I don't think it's a bad thing to find casual sex repulsive...I'm far from prudish, but the notion seems a little off to me as well.

I'd like to say you've improved my sex life, but I tried the light stroking you raved about with no obvious effect. ;-)

Oh, and inspiring me to start a writing blog is something you should be immensely proud of; especially as I got past the difficult initial stage (i.e. actually setting it up).

Sweets said...

i agree...most people find casual sex a natural/easy thing to do...i'm not like that...good to know i'm not alone...!

don juan...hmmm...i think you are the perfect modernised version!